Old Poem

I was going through an old journal the other day and came across something I wrote when I lived in Medicine Hat. It sounds like it's talking about a new romance, but in the moment of its writing I was actually consumed with thoughts about God and how He was teaching me to find my wholeness in Him, rather than trying to find it in other people. Maybe it's cheesy...I don't know, I tend to express myself that way...but I wanted to share it for some reason.

A look that says "I love you."
A touch that says "I care."
Strong arms that wrap around me.
Soft hands that stroke my hair.

A word so softly spoken
that no one else can hear.
I fall into this unknown,
forgetting all my fear.

My heart is pounding harder,
resistance fading fast.
One hand grabs for this new thing...
the other grips the past.

It's pain and it's excitement;
it's torture and it's grand.
I sit but I am flying;
I'm falling but I stand.

Peace has long since faded.
It beckons distantly.
My joy has gone and hidden
in the place where I'll be free.

I cannot find the truth now
unless in faith I leap,
risking all my comfort
for goodness I might keep.

Raw

He's there and I'm here. Sometimes that just squeezes the life out of me. I don't always have the energy to stay positive.