Frontier Friends

Johanna Marie Svee, if you're reading this, please know that I'm truly excited for your wedding. But it's also scary...it's like you're bringing up our whole group of Frontier girlfriends into the next dimension. Before you know it, we'll all be married and have ten kids hanging off our arms and legs as we read our time capsules to each other.
I was imagining what it would be like if we all ended up in the same nursing home together...oh my goodness, would that ever be funny! Megan will be going around cutting people's hair (with or without their permission), Amy will be slowly swing dancing behind her walker, Marian will be popping wheelies in her wheelchair, Johanna will be completely cut off from all oranges, and I'll be trying to wipe everyone's bums. Oh the hilarity!

Is this Loneliness or Conditioning?

I'm sitting here at home alone on a Saturday night and feeling mildly depressed about it, when all of a sudden the thought hits me: why am I depressed to be home alone on a Saturday night? If it was Wednesday or Monday night, I'd be totally fine. Yeah, I know weekends are different from weekdays, but that's not the point. The point is, I blame Archie comics and the like for conditioning us to believe we are dateless losers if we stay at home on the weekend, watching "10 Things I Hate About You" and playing piano and putting off housework. After all, I bet at least half of the people in the world are doing the exact same thing. And let's be honest, if/when I do get a boyfriend, I'll still be spending some Saturday evenings alone anyway.
While we're on this rampage, let's get mad at Disney and Barbies. I love most Disney movies, and Beauty and the Beast may be the grandest one ever, but come on! The Beast needed to fall in love by his 21st year to break the spell...do you remember the massively-muscled man who rose from the ground after all the airborne twisting and morphing? There's no way he's my age! He's got to be at least 30! And don't get me started on little miss Ariel's sixteen-year-old status when she marries Prince Eric (who is fairly hot).
And Barbies, in all their sickly perfection, send evil messages to little girls that I think stay with them subconsciously. We should all be like Courtney who, instead of playing "fashion magazine" or "supermodel" with the depreciating dolls, played "Holocaust" and "Escape from Slavery". At least she learned something about how to hide in secret rooms and how to fight back at the man who's whipping you.
That's my ramble. I need to mow my fluffy legs now.

Attention Challis

I just learned an amazing fact about a secret high society club that we're both in. It's so secret that I can't mention the name on this page...however, here's a clue. I just got off the phone with our mutual Frontier friend, and the initials of the club are the A.P.C.
If you figure it out, don't write it on here, or she'll kill us both. Then there would be no more A.P.C.

What Happened to Me?

I went from being a stoic Norwegian Lutheran to an emotional, tearful something. The turning point was, I believe, at CLBI when I learned that it's okay to feel what I feel and to be honest with myself about it. God's unconditional love for me was also made real there...come to think of it, that's maybe what tipped the scales. Ever since then (and especially the more He reveals Himself to me through His word, His guidance, and other people), I get choked up at songs, at sunsets, at circumstances. I probably cried at least twice after work last week. One time, the whole sky was pink and the clouds were golden at 10:00 pm. It was such a testiment to God's creativity and glory. On another day, I started crying because of these simple words in a Drentch song: "Jesus, you're amazing."
But I also cry easier at sad things, like missing Johanna's wedding shower and certain movies (Radio nearly killed me). Before CLBI, Titanic barely made me cry. And that one's downright depressing, regardless of how cheesy it actually is.

Oh boy...

A dilemma is happening, but the fact that this is a dilemma proves that life is pretty good right now...
I just got a call from Central Haven Care Home that they could use me as a special care aide...which is pretty much what I do at Valhalla right now, but it would pay more (not privately owned), it is also a Christian place, and there is a physio program there, which means that I would be in a perfect place if a PTA position opens up there in the future. Sweet. HOWEVER, my boss just went on a three-week vacation yesterday, and while she's gone there's no one in charge of hiring, so I'm a little concerned what will happen if Central Haven wants me right away. There is absolutely no breathing room at Valhalla as far as shifts go, so if I leave or move to part-time, every single other person on staff is affected. It's quite frustrating, as I've been subject to that a few times myself. And I'm one of only two full-time staffers, which mean the effects would be even bigger. SOOO... I've basically decided that if Central wants me right away, no matter how hard I'll try to negotiate with them, I'm going to turn it down. Coming from an outsider's perspective that is pure foolishness, but trust me, Valhalla's like a family to me now and I couldn't live with myself for putting so much pressure on everyone. But my prayer is that Central will let me give Valhalla a month's notice, cause then my boss can look for another full-timer while I'm preparing to start at Central.
I'm basically just blogging this so I can blow off some steam...and if anyone who reads this will pray for me, that would be super. And also, pray that Valhalla can find a new full-timer.
On a side note, Phantom of the Opera is maybe the best movie of life.