Escape Mechanism

Do you find yourself plagued by nightmares? Or maybe you have an average of only one nightmare per year, yet it's still a terrifying experience. Well, I've found a way of escape from these dreadful dreams. Actually, I can't take credit for it. My body sort of figured it out on its own. So without further adieu, here's the solution: snort really, really loud! Just one sudden, crisp, loud snort, and you will be whisked away from Scaryland where there are escaped convicts trapping you in a tilted house (where you are, naturally, running around naked and your clothes are somehow stuck to the floor), back to the safety of your bedroom. I have done this snort-escape a number of times, each time without actually planning it, so I have come to the conclusion that this is my subconscious' natural response to the paralyzing fear that nightmares evoke. The other curious thing, though, is that I always snort myself awake after several failed attempts to scream in my dream. I'm wondering if my subconscious is thinking, "Hey, if pushing air out the mouth doesn't work, maybe sucking it in through the nose does!"
Anyway, my point is, the snort works. It has rescued my pounding little heart on a number of occasions, so I highly recommend this method to all those subconsciouses out there.